Coaching children from birth through pre‑teen years
The idea of “coaching,” can feel abstract, especially with a very young child. What does it actually look like for a toddler, a second grader, or a pre-teen?
The short answer: coaching grows as your child grows. While the core focus stays the same, how that support looks changes by age.
Because caregivers play such an important role in a child’s growth, parent coaching is often a key part of care, especially in the early years. As kids grow, the way we coach grows with them. Below is a look at how coaching typically supports families across ages 0–4, 5–8, and 9–12, and how your role gently shifts over time while always staying essential.
Coaching for ages 0–2: Supporting the caregiver–child connection
For babies and toddlers, behavioral health coaching focuses primarily on partnering with caregivers. At this age, children are still developing basic communication skills and rely on adults to help them understand and manage their emotions. Coaching at this stage helps you understand developmental milestones and create a nurturing environment for your child. We can help with:
Sleep routines and challenges
Feeding and picky eating
Soothing fussiness
Separation anxiety
Building secure attachments
Caregivers learn how tone, body language, and simple words can calm nerves and build trust. Your calm helps your child learn to self-soothe. Coaching can help you feel less overwhelmed and more assured that what you’re seeing is developmentally normal, not a personal failure. The goal isn’t “perfect behavior.” It’s safety, attachment, and reducing stress for the whole family.
Coaching for ages 3-5: Building emotional skills together
Pre-school and early elementary years bring exciting growth and new challenges. Children at this age are learning to name emotions, follow rules, and navigate school and friendships, but they still need plenty of adult support. This stage is all about helping kids build emotional skills and giving caregivers tools to manage everyday ups and downs. We support families with:
Tantrums and emotional regulation
Sleep struggles
Creating routines and structure
Starting preschool or kindergarten
Early social-emotional learning
Children at this stage benefit from concrete tools like stories, visuals, role‑play, and practice. Caregivers focus on: guiding, modeling, and practicing skills alongside their child. They learn when to step in, when to step back, and how to stay connected during moments of frustration.
Coaching for ages 6–12: Supporting independence and resilience
Kids ages 6–12 are developing stronger opinions, a growing sense of fairness, and increased awareness of how others see them. Coaching for this age group often gives the child more space to participate directly, while caregivers remain closely involved. Focus areas may include:
School stress and academic challenges
Focus and organization skills
Friendships and peer relationships
Screen time and tech boundaries
Building resilience and self-esteem
At this stage, kids are becoming more independent and caregivers move into the role of guide and emotional anchor. Coaching supports parents in staying connected without taking over — listening more, fixing less, and offering steady support as children practice independence. Children learn tools they can use on their own, while caregivers learn how to keep communication open, even when kids become more private about their feelings.
BrightLife Kids is free for all California kids ages 0–12
Thanks to support from the State of California, families can access our behavioral health coaching services at no cost. When you join, you’ll get:
Free video coaching sessions tailored to your child
Secure messaging with expert coaches
Parenting tools and resources you can use right away
No cost. No insurance. No referral needed.
Just support — when and where you need it.
While coaching looks different at each age, our approach is to keep one thing constant: you are never expected to do this alone. Coaching meets your family where you are, respects your child’s developmental stage, and adapts as needs change.
Whether you’re parenting a toddler with big emotions, a school‑age child finding their footing, or a pre‑teen navigating new pressures, behavioral health coaching offers practical guidance and emotional support so your family can move through challenges with more calm, confidence, and connection.