If there are two things that continue to challenge most parents, it’s meals and bedtime. You know how it goes — a dish goes from a favorite to a “can’t stand it,” they want dessert for dinner, and some days nothing will do at all. Not to mention when they sleep through the night on one day that only leads to full-blown resistance to going to bed the next day.
It’s like being on a roller coaster with huge highs and stomach-dropping lows. As soon as you think you have a feel for it, you seem to get it wrong again. This doesn’t just go for tricky littles… preteens don’t make mealtime or bedtime easy, either.
The key is making them understand the connection between eating, getting enough rest, and how both affect their moods. You know that kids need food and sleep to fuel their developing minds and bodies. Kids — in their own way — know that, too.
But how do you get them to have fun on a play date when their energy is low because their sandwich was “too sticky” to eat? And how do you explain to your preteen that getting a good night's sleep instead of going to another sleepover isn’t punishment — it’s simply what their body needs to do well on that test or make it through practice?
These might feel like overwhelming questions when you’re knee-deep in meltdowns or explaining yourself through a locked bathroom door. Thankfully, there are a few simple strategies that can help. In addition, a BrightLife Kids coach can help your child build healthier eating and sleeping habits — one small step at a time.
Ages 0-4
Tips for managing tricky eaters:
Introduce a variety of foods early. Follow your pediatrician’s guidance when it’s time to offer your child pureed fruit and veggies, pasta, bread, and cereal. And no matter how gross the mush looks to you, try not to make any faces that might discourage kids from trying it.
Don’t give up. Babies and toddlers might not immediately accept new foods. Keep trying over several days. It can take several exposures to the same food before they’ll try something new, let alone enjoy it.
Stay calm. If your baby or toddler won’t try a new food, don’t force it. Make sure they’re getting enough of what they will eat and try again another day.
Make mealtime fun and interactive. Use colorful plates and cut food into fun shapes. Smile as you accept that squished blueberry they’re putting in your mouth. Let toddlers help with simple tasks like washing vegetables, mixing pancakes, or plating the food.
Keep it simple. Provide two options you feel good about and let them choose. Try to serve small portions — they can always ask for more, but starting out with too much food on their plate might be overwhelming.
Keep foods neutral. Avoid using food as a “reward.” For example, ice cream isn’t a treat your child gets only if they finish their broccoli. Broccoli is good, ice cream is good — everything in moderation.
Consider what it means to try. Toddlers might explore their foods in different ways like touching, squishing, smelling, or licking. All of these curious actions are different ways to get familiar with new food options. Welcome them all, especially if your child is hesitant or unsure.
Tips for building a good sleep routine:
Make a bedtime routine. Doing the same things before bed every night helps babies know it’s time to sleep. Try a warm bath, gentle rocking, and a bedtime story, then follow those same steps every night before going to bed.
Set up their sleeping space. Dark, cool, and quiet are key. Try adding a white noise machine or playlist if you live in a noisy building or neighborhood.
Encourage naps: Being overtired can make nighttime sleep harder to find. Regular naps can help. (Just be sure the naps don’t go too long or your little one could be wide awake at bedtime.)
Offer comfort items. Kids may feel more relaxed when they are tucked in with a favorite blanket or stuffed animal.
Limit screen time. Just like adults, kids need to turn screens off an hour or so before bed.
Ages 5-8
Tips for managing tricky eaters:
Presentation is key. Foods that they suddenly think are boring or babyish might suddenly be cool again if they’re made a different way. Try fruit on skewers, serving veggie sticks in a cup with dressing, or serving soup in a grown-up coffee mug.
Connect “healthy” to “strong.” Teach kids that food helps them think smarter, kick the ball harder, and grow strong. Keep easy-to-grab snacks that fuel your child’s body well in a place where they can serve themselves. They’ll be making good decisions for themselves, and you’ll get a break from being the snack monitor.
Find balance: You love cheesy chips and gummy bears as much as any 8-year-old but you can’t eat them all the time. The same goes for kids. It’s about finding balance so they can enjoy all different kinds of foods without any “good” or “bad” label attached to them.
Tips for building a good sleep routine:
Protect bedtime. As kids get older, it’s natural for their schedule to become a little less rigid. Try your best to keep a consistent bedtime so kids get enough sleep every night. But let yourself be flexible when practice runs late or there are only a few minutes left of their favorite show.
Keep limiting screens. If you’ve already been keeping a “no screens before going to bed” rule, keep at it! But if a screen-free bedtime is a new rule in your house, try swapping out screens for something calming but interactive. Try family story time, quiet reading together, or listening to soothing music.
Stay active during the day. Tiring your kids out during the day at playgrounds, backyards, and jungle gyms will also help them get better sleep.
Ages 9-12
Tips for managing picky eaters:
Encourage independence and participation. Older kids can help with meal planning, grocery shopping, and cooking (not to mention cleaning up after meals). Get creative with new fruits and veggies (Dragonfruit! Mini cukes!) or ask them about that viral recipe they’ve wanted to try.
Keep simple meals and snacks available. Easy-to-grab is the name of the game. Have granola, fruit, and yogurt, sandwich fixings, or leftovers kept in individual containers on hand. That way, older kids can handle their hunger themselves — just the way they like it.
Talk about the connection between food and health. Kids need to hear things several times before it clicks. The more you can connect their food choices with mind/body energy levels and doing the things they love, the better. How you as a caregiver model a healthy relationship with food and your own body matters, too.
Tips for building a good sleep routine:
Encourage the same sleep schedule every night. Yes, even on weekends. Of course, sleepovers and the occasional late night are okay. Just watch for patterns of sleep and of behavior/mood/energy levels.
Make bedrooms a tech-free space. Keep phones, tablets, and laptops out of the bedroom. Set up an overnight charging station somewhere else. And discourage using them before bed.
Creating routines that stick
Mealtime and bedtime don’t have to feel like daily battles. With patience, consistency, and a little creativity, you can help your child build habits that fuel their body, calm their mind, and support their growth at every age.
You don’t have to do it alone! Brightlife Kids coaches can help your kids to start building better habits when it comes to eating and going to bed. Sign up for free today and get the help you need.